Favourite Oxymorons

Oxymorons are kinda fun... and everyone has their favourites, usually classics like "Microsoft Works" or "Military Intelligence."

My current favourite is Early Night - the thing described being, as best I can tell, the single biggest myth of adulthood (shortly followed by... nah, not going there). Seriously, I keep telling myself that one day soon I'll track down, ambush and exploit an Early Night - I've heard it's a great way to catch up on sleep - but no matter how hard I try I just cannot find one anywhere. Been looking for years, too.

I guess it's kind of ironic justice that a guy who's PhD (currently undergoing final corrections) involved studies where circadian rhythmicity was a factor is afflicted with an endogenous activity rhythm that has bugger all in common with normal everyday life. As I type I'm practically falling asleep, I'm that tired, and its what... quarter to 5 in the afternoon right now. Yet come a normal, decent, time to go to bed I'll be wide awake... come an hour when my body might actually let me nod off, I'll not feel the slightest inclination or need to do so. And this is why the early night is, to me, a myth; if I try to go to bed early - tired or no - I just cannot or will not sleep... in essence it does me no good. So generally I'll stay up longer, wake up mentally and have to force myself to go to bed when mentally wide awake in order to drift off. And often even then I don't sleep. I've probably been sleep deprived for the entirity of my adult life come to think of it...

Not really much about oxymorons in that at all in the end. Oh well.